hey man.

So I was just sitting in class today, thinking about my life, contemplating this stupid brief chance I get at making something matter, and in the midst of all of that... I realized it's high time I start using this blog again.
I made my other one in the very middle of a high-drama, high-anger time, and that's really the vibe I'm still getting from that blog. I am not ever interested in posting, and I just feel more at home on this one, I suppose.
So anyways, that explains my somewhat abrupt return to This Just In.

To catch you guys up, here are the happenings of my life:
1. I actually just got the call that I was finally hired as a barista at the coffee tent at Interlochen. All I can say is, after 4 years of begging, omg finally. lol.
2. I am very very very much in love. (: It's almost been a trip down memory-lane recently, but I was reading through my old journals and my old posts on here and... yeah. I was always nervous I wasn't actually in love and something better, more powerful, stronger, something I'd rather fight for, would come along and I'd be completed instead of finding a puzzle piece that sort of fits if you kind of wiggle it and then pound it down and pretend you don't notice that it doesn't fit right. And apparently I had a right to be so. It's been over a year and we are stronger than ever.<3 <3 <3
3. I'm not going back to school next year. (: Current roommate and bffffff, Rach, and I are moving to Boulder, Colorado and not coming back. lol. Ever. But seriously, we're getting an apartment and working for a year. Then going to the University of Colorado at Boulder in the fall of 2013. Everybody I talk to says that's a place I'm really going to shine. Well, I sincerely hope so. I'm tired of explaining my personality to all the clones out here.
4. I did my year without meat, and now I'm occassionally eating a little bit. I'll still probably choose the vegetarian dish, but I'm not completely cutting it off. It's nice to feel accomplished and free. At least in that one aspect of my life.
5. I'm on a super weight loss kick. Blahh. It's been three weeks, and it took a little while to adjust to it, but now it's totally rad. I've only lost 5 pounds so far, but seriously... I have a good excuse for this past week, lol. But seriously, it's a super kick. Not just a kick, a super one.
6. And of course, some things never change... journaling<3. reading<3. movies<3. maybe that one's new. (:

Whatever, working on defining myself, working on being happy in such a grey place. Forever uncertain.

-elyse... or someone like it.

drew just took my seat.

you ever have someone who just changed your life?

you're not sure why, and it doesn't exactly make sense.

but when you think of them, you just smile and remember. but miss them like crazy? for no reason at all.
here

welcome to this week.



lately... lots of late nights, early mornings, journaling and letters, iced tea and flowers, boyfriend kisses and nail biting.



there's still time, i suppose. but right now it would be nice to jump on in.





i want to be you.



here

Sitting at Borders.

here

I don't have a ton of time, but I figured I owe it to you to update.

I ran into him and it was actually okay. I'm still alive.

I was worried about having a boyfriend in the summer because I'm a big "looking for a love interest" person, but I love having Drew here and having him understand everything.

In the past 4 days, I've:

* taken 3 trips to borders

* squished 5 people into a photo booth

* lost my phone

* kissed in the rain (FINALLY)

* seen Toy Story 3

* been informed there is a mouse in my cabin

* found a topless bar I never knew existed

it's looking like it's going to be a pretty decent summer. (: last night it occurred to me I actually might have a legitimate group of friends this year. So far, it's looking like it will be me, Kallen, Caitlin, Dylan, Drew, and maybe James (: Oh, I enjoy life some days.

here

however, i feel like things would be better if i looked like this girl. she's cute.

PS: i got an amazing bicycle yesterday. it's one i've wanted for a long time, and i finally found the exact one i want. (: maybe i'll get a picture for you guys later. in the meantime, stay sweet. (:

Happy New Journal, Elyse.

Envy has always been a problem of mine. No matter who or what it is, I can always find a way to be envious. But this time... I really think I have a reason.
here

He's there without me. :/ And I miss him.


Kallen and I went on a drive the other day. On the way home, I realized these are the moments that make up the story of my life. It seemed rather insignificant at the time. But looking back... It's dumb of me to be upset that I don't feel interesting sometimes... When I have 86,400 seconds in a day to do something I'm proud of.


I, Elyse Terry, promise to grab each moment
and not let go. I promise to find something
beautiful and spectacular each day, and to
treat life with the respect and love it deserves.

here

The Fight.

I have not been this worried about my relationship since... I got in it.

Lately I've been feeling very neutral about life, and it's wearing through my relationship with Drew. He asks what's wrong, and I say nothing, because I'm not sure how to explain this feeling. When he pushes and pushes, I keep saying I'm okay because I don't know what else to say. And then he lets it go. And it breaks my heart. And I feel like I need to let him know. But of course I can't say it like a normal person. So I bitch him out until I'm in tears.

But maybe it's a good thing. Some times I get in moods where I feel like it's time for a heart to break. Usually it's mine. But sometimes, by breaking my own heart... I break other people's. I can never win.

I was flipping through my journal today

on the way to Cincinnati, and I found a quote I'd written a month or so back, and it said, "Life rarely matches our

expectations." I thought maybe I was telling myself I was just in a rough patch with my fire for life. And although this should probably make me feel better... I have never felt more hopeless.

this is where i was today.

These Pills.

Pirates of The Caribbean is on the t.v.
it reminds me of high school.
am i ready for this?

i have a favourite mug.
every time i use it, i am reminded of the day i bought it. sitting outside a bakery on a beautiful summer day, eating pie and drinking coffee with my family. i am also reminded of the electric green van that drove by, and the picture message i sent to my close friend, who had a deep obsession with anything green. i am reminded of the times she, along with 5 of my other close friends, used to come over for random crazy parties. i remember feeling cute, and skinny, and alive.

The other day, I accidentally sat on my favorite sunglasses. They were black and heart shaped. Immature, I know, but so fun to wear. At the mall yesterday, I was determined to find a new pair. I don't last long without sunglasses. I finally found a pair I could live with, but they are so plain. They have rounded rectangular lenses, and a cheetah print frame. They're cute... but they can never measure up to my heart shapes. As I was complaining to my best friend, she said something that changed my view on everything: " it's a new era."

am i really the only one who feels like life is falling flat of my expectations for it?