My New Hat (:

i have never felt more hopeless and boring in my life than i did today. i hardly talked to drew because he was at work all day. and when i did talk to him, he was hanging out with people at work. at interlochen. without me. i miss him and i just want to be there.

i don't mean to sound insulting to you guys at all. i love you, i really do. but at this point every year, i just want to be back there.

in addition to him being at work all day, which sucked in itself... i found out he's working with his kind-of-sort-of they-fooled-around-a-little-bit-last-summer girl. he said they're still talking, but it is kind of awkward. no kidding it's a little awkward. it's a little awkward for me too. and it makes me feel horrible. i know i have no reason to worry, he loves me, etc. HOWEVER. i am very uncomfortable knowing he is going to be in the exact same situation he was last summer when he fell for her. it just makes me feel horrible and like i'm not good enough. don't ask why, i'm not sure. i just feel like she's so much better.

am i being a brat here? i know it's not his fault. but it's so much easier to just be upset with him than at the situation. i need somebody to be angry with, and i don't want to be this girl. i don't want to be upset over stupid things. so please, somebody, tell me if i am.

since it's technically friday here... i suppose a fill in the blank is necessary. (:

1. love is a real life porn, minus all the stuff that makes porn cool. (:

2. dancing in the rain makes me happy.

3. when my windows are open i hope birds fly in.

4. last time i laughed really hard was today in shelby's gran's pool.

5. the smell of seafood makes me queasy.

6. i think freckles are so adorable.